Second Chance: A New Adult Step-Sibling Read online

  “Guess it must be bad. You gonna get around to kissing and making up on the trip, then?”

  Jason’s throat tightened into a vise. “No.”

  “Seems like the smart thing to do.” Valerie paused, her voice soft when she spoke again. “It’s not good to hold these kinds of grudges, Jay. Especially with the people you care about.”

  “Yeah,” Jason said. “I need to dry off. Thanks for taking my shifts again, Val – I’ll make up for it.”

  “No problem. Just think about what I said, OK?”

  Valerie hung up before Jason could reply, even if he wanted to. Or could.

  What am I going to do?

  He didn’t want to back down from what he’d said and done, couldn’t, but Valerie’s words had struck a chord in him. Being emotionally distant from Sam had been like losing her, worse because he still saw her on occasion. If he’d been able to move away, then he might’ve been able to forget about her, but the time since their fight had only made an already unclosed wound worse.

  What am I going to do about you, Sam?

  * * * *

  Sam stood from her chair as the song proceeded to her improvisational solo part. She let the music carry her as she drew her bow across the strings; she’d long ago memorized the piece. As the rest of the quartet proceeded on, she pushed herself harder and faster, forcing them to match her allegro as their notes buoyed her on.

  She loved the violin, and not just because her life had been full of music. The power and thrill she had when playing – the attention on her, playing the works of geniuses like her father – were intoxicating. It was difficult to compare the sensation she got from playing to anything else; only sparring after a vigorous night of karate practice came close.

  It also distracted her from the travesty that was her half-ruined Hartford trip. Channeling her irritation into the music gave it a depth and power that could’ve filled a concert hall. It was rare that she could ever fully push herself so strongly into her playing – Sam rarely felt the rawness or vigor to truly do so.

  Guess Jason is good for something.

  When her solo ended the song finished. Opening her eyes, she slumped back into her chair and took in a deep breath. “I think we’ve nailed the piece.”

  Amanda laughed as she relaxed against her chair. “Then set it on fire and thrown it off a cliff.”

  “Not before drowning it, of course.”

  Max, the other violinist, cleared his throat. “If I’d known how violent all of you were, I’d have reconsidered joining this group.”

  Jeanette laughed and punched his shoulder, the larger girl’s blow nearly knocking him out of his seat. “It’s all in good fun. And thanks again for deciding to play with us – we’ve really been hurting for another member since Julia left.”

  “Well, it’s rare to find decent players my age, especially at the school,” Max said, straightening himself in his seat. “It’s a pleasure to play with all of you.”

  Roger came down the stairs, shopping bags in one hand and cooler in the other. “Hope you’re all hungry, ‘cause I brought stuff to eat!”

  “Thanks, Bear,” Jeanette said, wrapping her boyfriend up in a hug. “You always know the right thing to do.”

  Roger gave a massive grin and nuzzled his nose against Jeanette’s. “The right things for the right girl.”

  Sam shared a look with Amanda when Jeanette set her cello aside to enthusiastically embrace her boyfriend. They’d been saccharine together for their entire relationship. As much as they loved their friend, it was occasionally difficult to be around her.

  “If that’s all for today, I’ll be headed out,” Max said. “Again, thank you for letting me play with your group, and for letting me come to your home, Sam.”

  “No problem,” Sam said. “Same time next week if you’re free.”

  Amanda tilted her head. “What, don’t want to stay for food?”

  Max glanced at Roger and Jeanette, who were still being sickeningly affectionate with one another. “No.”

  Sam smirked as Max put his violin away and soon followed suite. Once finished, she walked to the table where Roger had spread out the food and grabbed a handful of chips. “Thanks for the food,” she said to him.

  “Nah problem,” Roger responded, mouth full of half-chewed pretzels. He swallowed and wiped his mouth. “You guys gonna be practicing over break? Because I can totally get more food from my brother if you are.”

  “I won’t be here,” Sam replied. “Going on a road trip.”

  Roger blinked. “Really? Because Jeanie said you were going to cancel because your brother had to go with you.”

  Sam sighed as Jeanette glared at her boyfriend. “Some things are too important to let a douche bag get in the way of. Hartford is one of those things.”

  “I’d totally go with you if my parents weren’t dragging me to Bible camp,” Amanda muttered.

  “Well, maybe you’ll have fun,” Jeanette said.

  “Not the kind of fun I’d be having at Hartford.” Amanda gave Sam a doleful look. “Although who knows what you’ll be able to do with Big Brother around.”

  “I dunno,” Roger said. “Jason always seemed like a cool guy, you know?”

  Sam crushed the chips in her mouth to pulp. They were going to institute a “no boyfriends” policy for their quartet if Roger kept asking about her brother. “You never had to live with him.”

  “What’d he do that was so bad?”

  “He snitched on us,” Amanda said.

  Roger’s eyes shot wide open. “You guys were in prison?”

  Jeanette whacked his back and almost made him stumble into the cooler. “No!”

  “We were at a party,” Sam muttered angrily. A part of her wished she’d never gone to it and avoided the fight with Jason, but she shoved the feeling down from where it came from. He’d still be the same damn asshole even if we hadn’t fought. “There was some booze and other stuff. I might’ve had a drink or two.”

  Amanda rolled her eyes. “More like two dozen.”

  Sam grabbed a handful of M&Ms and flung them at Amanda. “I wasn’t that wasted.”

  “You weren’t there, were you?” Roger asked, looking at Jeanette.

  “No, I had mono, remember?” Jeanette squeezed his hand and flashed a dimpled smile at him. “Totally worth it, by the way.”

  “But yeah,” Sam said. “I needed a lift home, so I rang Jason to pick me up.”

  “And instead of being a decent person, he told their parents about what happened,” Amanda said, exhaling a sharp breath. “She got busted, her mom told my mom, and I was grounded for a month. All over a few drinks.”

  Sam sunk into her chair, resisting the urge to hug her knees to her chest. I wish that was all that had happened. “My parents got over it eventually, kind of, but he’s been a douche-nozzle ever since. It’s like he thought they weren’t hard enough on me and he’s been trying to make up for that.”

  Roger, now sitting on the couch with Jeanette, wrapped his arm around his girlfriend. “Man, that really sucks. Guess I was wrong about him.”

  “Well, kind of,” Jeanette said. “He used to be pretty cool with us. But after he busted Sam, he became a real jerk.”

  Sam’s anger declined in the face of a shrouded sadness that swept into her. He’d definitely changed that night, seemingly doing everything he could to make himself as unlikable to her as possible. It was if their fight had switched a flip inside him, and the divide between them had only grown as time went on, no matter how hard she tried to change that in the beginning.

  She blew a strand of hair from her face. What a waste of time.

  Amanda glanced down at her phone. “It’s still early. Anyone wanna hit the movies?”

  Sam shook her head. “I’ve gotta do some packing before the trip, and I said I’d help my mom’s friend who got injured. Probably going to do that for awhile.”

  “Aw,” Jeanette said. “Well, I’m up for seeing something.�
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  “Me too,” Roger added.

  Amanda shouldered her viola case while Roger picked up Jeanette’s cello. “Don’t let your brother ruin the trip for you, OK? You’ve been looking forward to this for too long to let some asshole get in your way.”

  Sam nodded. “You’re right.”

  “Well, duh.”

  Sam laughed, but her mirth faded before her friends had left her basement. The trip and her future meant a great deal to her, but Jason had once as well. As much as she wished she could deny it, a piece of her wished she could trade her visit to Hartford to have her old brother back.

  Chapter 4

  * * * Nine Years Ago * * *

  “… and no one ever made me laugh and cry as hard as Haruka did when she laid out what I needed to do before she accepted my proposal.”

  Sam smiled and laughed with the rest of the wedding reception at her father’s joke. Haruka nudged him with her elbow, and the two lifted their wine glasses together. The other guests did so as well, Sam joining in with her cup of sparkling grape juice.

  “To our new union,” Haruka said, “and all of you for coming and celebrating it with us.”

  A mass clinking of glasses ensured, followed by drinking their toasts and applause. Music came from the stage as the conversations resumed between the guests. Haruka and Davis remained on their small table in the center of the room, guests coming by for conversation and well-wishes.

  “Heck of a ceremony.”

  Sam turned toward the speaker. Jason had just sat down in the chair besides her, stretching his long limbs as he settled in. Unlike other boys his age, he filled out well, looking more like a young adult in his tuxedo than a teenager playing dress-up. He still managed to look carefree and cocky with his smile, but she knew it was an act– the brightness shining from his face showed how happy he was for his mother and Davis.

  And it makes him handsome.

  Jason pursed his lips. “You OK? You’re a little red.”

  “I’m fine,” Sam said quickly. “Just embarrassed. Parents, right?”

  He let out a husky laugh. “Yeah. I can’t believe they mentioned us in their vows.”

  “Well, they did meet each other at the karate class.” Sam twisted her lips into a crooked grin. “My dad had to apologize to your mom when I kicked your butt.”

  “Good thing I let you win that match, right?”

  “Sure thing, bro.”

  Jason lightly punched her shoulder and both laughed. “So we’re still friends, right?”

  Sam blinked. “Why wouldn’t we be?”

  He shrugged. “I hear a bunch of crap from my friends who have brothers and sisters. They don’t really like them, and they’re always fighting.” The bright expression he wore darkened. “I think they’re kind of dumb, but it happens a lot. Maybe it’s an unofficial rule or something.”

  She shook her head. “It is stupid. And I’ve never heard about that rule before.”

  “I didn’t say it was a real rule,” Jason huffed. “It’s unofficial.”

  “Uh, OK.”

  He gulped and looked down at the table. “I want to be friends with you. I don’t want to lose that just because of our parents. And I’m not great at this kind of thing.”

  Sam’s heart cringed. Reaching out, she touched his larger hand and had to suppress a tiny gasp. A slight tingle ran from her hand to her chest, tentative warmth spreading out from there to the rest of her body. They’d sparred and had glancing contact before, but for some reason this was different – like their conversation had opened a new way for her to feel about him.

  “It won’t be like that,” she said. “We started off as friends, and unless you do something stupid, we’ll stay friends. We’re even better off now that we’ll be living in the same house.”

  Jason looked up and met her gaze, blue eyes heavy. “You think so?”

  Sam squeezed his hand. Its warmth and strength buoyed her fluttering heart; she wanted him to run it through her hair. “I know so.”

  He gave a small smile. “Well, if you’re so sure, then I guess that’s good enough for me.”

  Sam opened her mouth, but a new song boomed over the speakers. Her face nearly split as she recognized the singer, standing and pulling Jason up. “I love this song! You’ve gotta dance with me!”

  Jason gave an exaggerated sigh but allowed himself to be pulled toward the dance floor by Sam.

  * * * Present Day * * *

  Jason leaned back against the hood of his car and yawned. He’d never minded waking up early, but he wanted his disinterest in the trip to be obvious to Sam. Feigning a lack of interest in her would be easier if she threw a fit at him.

  And it’ll be easier for me to stay away if she hates me.

  He squeezed his eyes shut. Despite Valerie’s advice and his own feelings, he was still unsure of what to do with his sister. Jason knew that cowardice wouldn’t get him anywhere, but communicating his real feelings to her now, after all had been said and done, was like climbing a wall that stretched to the sky. Even if he had the words, he wasn’t sure if he had the endurance for it.

  The sound of his old home’s door being flung open made him open his eyes. Sam was trudging down the steps carrying a massive suitcase in both hands and an equally weighty backpack slung over her shoulders. She sweated in the heat, but her face only grew red when she met his gaze.

  “You could offer to help me,” she said, words barely more than a snarl.

  Jason wanted to take her suitcase but stopped himself. Helping her would only make things worse, at least until he decided what he needed to do. Instead, he shrugged and walked around to the drivers seat.

  “I didn’t want to set the feminist movement back by assuming you couldn’t move your own bags,” he said, sitting down and popping the trunk open.

  Sam grumbled when she threw her bag into the trunk, the impact rocking the car. “There’s no room back here. Why the hell can’t we use Dad’s car?”

  “Because Dad doesn’t trust anyone but Mom with his car and he never gave me the keys to it.” Jason rolled his eyes; as much as he liked his stepfather, he’d never been able to understand his affection for automobiles. “There’s enough room back there. Just work it a little.”

  She grumbled, shifting the car as she struggled to pack her suitcase into the trunk. A minute later she threw open the passenger door and tossed her backpack onto the floor before sitting down. Sweat soaked her blue blouse, and for a moment Jason thought it came from the boiling temper that was clearly showing on her face. He winced when she slammed the door shut; it wouldn’t take much abuse to damage his car.

  “You sure this thing can hold together?” she asked. “Because if it breaks down on the middle of the road and makes me late for my meeting with Julia, I’ll—“

  “Act half your age and throw a fit again?” Jason started the car and pulled out into the street. “It’ll run just fine.”

  “I’ll believe that when we get there.” Sam took out a charger cord from her backpack, scowling when she failed to find an outlet for it. “Jesus freaking Christ, when was this thing made? I think it’s older than me.”

  “It’s actually about my age,” Jason said. “Mom’s dad worked with cars his entire life and brought it home from the scrap yard. He gave this to her around the time my dad left with their car.”

  Sam ran her hand across the dashboard. “Damn, that old? Guess I didn’t give it enough credit.”

  Jason shrugged. “My grandfather was a good mechanic, and Mom took care of it pretty well. Not much more to say about it than that.”

  “It’s a classic, a symbol of its time that’s lived way past it. It’s got to mean something.”

  He glanced at Sam. Her angry expression had been replaced with a more introspective one, eyes widened slightly as she regarded the car. He had to force himself not to smile at the sight; her high cheekbones and dimples made her cute and ageless, bearing maturity beyond her years.
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br />   At least when she isn’t throwing a fit at me. He gave a brief shake of his head. Better that than the alternative.

  “I guess you could say that,” Jason said as he turned onto the freeway. “It’s always been a tool to me. Something I’m thankful for having, but still just something I use at the end of the day.”

  “That’s cold,” Sam said. There was no rancor in her voice, only a blanket statement of fact as if she couldn’t be contradicted. Jason loved the confidence in her voice – it was a subtle strength, powerful but not obnoxious. “I could never look at my violin that way.”

  “Do you like—“

  “Love.”

  Jason chuckled. “Do you love your violin or the music it creates?”

  Sam put a finger to her chin. “I don’t separate them. You can’t have one without the other, and I love them both for it.”

  “Guess that’s fair. Different, but fair.”

  Just like you.

  Jason squeezed the wheel hard a moment after the thought entered his mind. He couldn’t let himself get close to her again and end up facing the same situation he had a year ago, especially since he still had no answer as to what he’d do now. More time was needed; he couldn’t let himself be weak and vulnerable, especially in front of Sam.

  “Not like your tastes, though,” he said a long moment later.

  Sam exhaled a harsh breath. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  “What do you think I mean? You’re into shit music and don’t play much better. If you were really as good as you thought you were, you’d be composing like Dad, not replaying some dead white guy’s boring crap.

  Jason cringed as his stepsister’s face became warped by anger and hurt. It was as if he’d sucker-punched her with a brick. The need to apologize filled him as surely as the need to breathe, but he held onto the pain, both that he’d inflicted and what he felt. There was no other way he’d remain strong enough to resist his temptations.

  “Go to hell,” Sam spat.

  “Already there, little sis.”

  Sam wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Not that I’d expect a jackass who wants to scratch people with needles for a living to understand what real art is about.”